Hypocrisy v. Prejudgement

hypocrisy – n. the behavior of people that do things that they tell others to do or not to do.

prejudge – v. to make a conscious decision that something is so based on your own understanding, before getting all the facts and complete, factual understanding.

Before I begin, I will admit that I am guilty of both things. Now that that is out of the way, let’s talk about how these two things cause for a lot of torn relationships and deterrence of certain things. Both can keep you from getting places and make doors to some opportunities close. If you are ready to be told about yourself, grab your tea and let’s begin.

Hypocrisy

I can say with assurance that we have all been subject to this, if not having been a hypocrite ourselves. We have been told by someone to do something or not do something and we see them do the complete opposite in the same, or similar, situation. We tend to not trust that person and refrain from asking them for advice about anything else that we may have a problem with. Prime example, you are in a relationship (this is the best example because this seems to always be when hypocrisy takes place) and you and your significant other are just hashing it out, nonstop. You go to a friend to see what you should do. Now this person, being your friend, will side with you, giving you a biased opinion and solution. You take their advice and break things off. A few months later, your friend comes to you with the same problem you had, but instead of them taking the advice that they gave you, they stay with the person. Now you are miserable and lonely, and they are miserable too, but they have someone to be miserable with.

Another example, say you are in a store and someone cuts in front of you and you don’t say anything, but your friend says that you should let that person know where the back of the line is. So you say something and all hell breaks loose. Y’all are in a store a week later and the same thing happens to your friend. You tell them they should say something and they say, “Oh, no, they can skip. I’m not in a hurry anyway.” You see where I am going?

Hypocrisy is giving advice to someone and not standing by your own words, not practicing what you preach. Many times people talk a good game, but never can back it up. Words are cheap and the easiest way to not confront something. I’m here to tell you, stop being a hypocrite. We have all been hypocrites at some point in our lives. You were probably hypocritical about something five minutes ago, don’t lie. We can be honest with each other. It comes down to telling someone what we would do in a situation that we have never been in. We don’t know how we will react in that situation until it presents itself. Now, let’s talk about Instagram.

Yes, Instagram has the most hypocrites, also known as “fronters”, than any other social media site. People say a picture us worth a 1000 words, but what if that picture isn’t real? You can see a person with a hundred thousand dollar car on Instagram, and that car not even be theirs. They could just so happen to walk by someone’s car and take a picture, pretending that it’s theirs. The car could also be rented, belong to a friend, or they could’ve cropped the car dealership out and photoshopped them being somewhere else. Hypocrites are pretenders. They tend to portray a life that they do not actually live.

Hypocrites are everywhere and sometimes it is hard to tell when someone is being honest and when someone is faking. In this world of technology, it is easy to be anything you want, even if you actually aren’t. For example, half these women on social media that men thirst over, don’t look like that in real life, and may not even be a woman, not with access to good filters and plastic surgeons, and vice versa. Men are guilty of filtering themselves as well, to attract the kind of attention that they want. But what happens when the darkness comes to light? Everything is revealed. I’m just saying, don’t take social media for face value, literally.

Prejudgment

Again, I know we have all been prejudged and have done some prejudging (don’t look around, I’m talking to you). There is not a single person who has never judged anyone or anything prior to knowing the facts. We all know the saying, don’t judge a book by its cover. I am here to tell you, we do it all the time. For example, you probably read the title to this post and thought this was just a rant post or something, and thought about not clicking on it and reading it. By now, you have probably noticed that I have not ranted, though there is still time, but I won’t.

When we first meet a person, what do we know about them automatically? Nothing, aside from how they are dressed and their body language. We tend to judge people off of this because before we can speak to them, that is all we know about them. We judge them from how they are dressed and the vibe we get from their body language. For example, and I have heard this more times than I can count, a lot of my friends now, have told me that when they first met me, they thought I was a “stuck up bitch” (verbatim). I don’t blame them because when I first meet someone, I instantly don’t like them. It’s nothing against them or anything, it’s just my way of getting to know someone. I don’t instantly take to people. Wait…that’s getting off subject. Anyway, upon first meeting me, people think I am a bitch. But once they get to know me, they always tell me how sweet, kindhearted, generous, caring and loving I am, and these things are true, I’m not making this up. There are witnesses.

I don’t purposely come off that way, it’s just I have to warm up to people. Another example, one of my co-workers, male, came off to me as gay because of his mannerisms. He swishes when he walks, he moves his hands when he talks and his voice is a tad high pitched. Next thing I know, he’s talking about his girlfriend (though I am pretty sure he is gay, I have enough gay friends to know when a man is gay). Many times I prejudge people and I normally am right about them. I don’t do this to say that I am better than them or that I some sort o psychic, but to see if this person is someone that I want hanging around me and feeding off of my energy.

We tend to prejudge someone or something because we are unsure of them/it and it’s unfamiliar. When at a bookstore, people often pick up a book based on what they see on the cover, not even reading the description or skimming a few pages. They base their want of the book on the cover. That is prejudging; thinking that it is going to be good because of what it looks like on the outside.

My Point

Of course I have a point. I didn’t write over 1000 words for nothing. Hypocrisy and prejudgment go hand in hand. We tell people not to judge a book by its cover, but we turn around and judge the book by its cover. The main ones who speak this colloquialism (SAT word, look it up), are the ones who prejudge the most. Never point out someone else’s faults and shortcomings, without first looking at the man or woman in the mirror. We tend to put our judgments and hypocrisy upon others because we can’t fathom there being something wrong with us. Get over it. You have shitty things going on in your life as much as the next person. Don’t pass judgment and don’t be a hypocrite.

xoxo,

Simply Moniqua

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